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I'm Torn (a poem)

A poem about me and my internal struggles.
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I’m Torn

There’s a battle inside

Where no one can see

A struggle between

Different parts of me


I write what I feel

No audience in mind

Words sometimes flow

With odd rhythms and rhymes


When at last I finish

A strange feeling sets in

It’s a craving of sorts

To find someone akin


A companion who’ll relate

To the thoughts on the page

Whether sentiments of joy

Or throttled fits of rage


I put myself out there

Throwing fear to the side

And wait for the comments

Vowing to take them in stride


Only two likes?

Did anyone read?

I should be happy

But it’s less than I need


Why do I care?

They’re only my thoughts

It’s not like I’m putting them

In a book to be bought


Oh, silly boy

Contradictory you are

Wanting things to be noticed

As if you were a star


Yet if people noticed

If they gave you much praise

You’d shrink back in dread

To avoid spotlight’s rays


You crave the acclaim

In a non-public way

One-on-one would be best

To hear what they say


Then you could deflect

All the glory aside

It could be much better

If harder I tried


Compliments are hard

For me to receive

I feel undeserving

I cannot believe


So why do I want them

I ask of myself

If I’m only going to

Put them up on a shelf


I have no answers

To these questions I ponder

There seems no solution

And my mind starts to wander


It’s a battle inside

Where no one can see

A struggle between

Different parts of me


I’m torn
 
Author notes
I only dabble in poetry, and it shows here. However, it's me...
Story length
short story

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